Have you heard of picking a word for the year? It’s sort of like making a New Year’s resolution, but because it can be a bit more broad than losing weight or starting a new hobby, it allows you to instead take on a more wholistic approach to self improvement. Your one word shapes every action and decision for the year ahead, allowing you to be more purposeful and productive in your desire for growth and betterment. It is essentially setting the tone for the year ahead.
For me 2017 was a complete and total upheaval of my life. I did not pick a word for 2017 because I started the year out with a 2 month old and could barely even think to make myself breakfast. This year was full of a lot of growing pains and difficult personal decisions. Not only did I experience my first full year of motherhood, but I also attempted to navigate going to work after having a baby, and ultimately chose to quit my job – a decision that was both extremely difficult and absolutely the best choice I could’ve made for myself. I struggled with my identity because when your main priority is taking care of a helpless baby, it’s very easy to lose yourself a little. Everything about you changes, and it’s not a bad thing, but it’s a very confusing place to be in. I didn’t even recognize or feel comfortable in my body, as I am still hanging on to an extra 20lbs from having said baby. This year, I also had to avoid most news stories because, wow what a freaking dumpster fire this year has been. It was also a year of struggling with my faith – not from a personal point of view, but from the way my faith connects with the greater Christian community (blog on this coming soon!). On top of all of that, at the end of 2017, I entered into my last year of my 20s, which is always great for spurring on a bit of an existential crises. If I looked back on the year, the most fitting word for it would likely just be a bunch of question marks.
However, I feel like I’ve finally come out of the haze and a little bit, and I have been trying very hard to be more purposeful and aware of how I am living my one wild and precious life. I have gone through the wringer of personal change but I am coming out on the other side more clear eyed than before, so the word that seems most fitting for the year 2018 is “renew” – to make like new; restore to freshness and vigor.
In 2018, I hope to have:
Renewal of how I identify myself as wife, mother, sister, daughter, friend.
Renewal of how I spend my days as a no longer employed but most definitely still working SAHM.
Renewal of the goals and dreams I have for myself.
Renewal of my body and my relationship with it.
Renewal of my priorities and how I spend my time.
Renewal of how I view and love and exist in this ugly beautiful world.
Renewal of the way I love Jesus and the way His love for me guides and shapes my life.
2017 happened to me, but I will choose to happen in 2018 with intentionality on my heart and a spirit that has been wholly and completely renewed.